Oh Heck No
by The-Faygo-Person
Summary: You are Dave Strider, and you are losing your cool.
1. Chapter 1

**Be the cool kid named Dave**

You were lying on the floor, staring up at the ceiling. Karkat was screaming his brains out at you. He was stomping and even took off his shirt at one point before putting it back on as soon as he took it off. You sighed and hit your hand on the ground a couple times. You looked over at the arm that was messed up. Twisted completely out of proportion. Pretty bloody. All but one finger broken. You swore you saw some bone somewhere, but the pain was probably just messing with your mind juices. Or at least that's what you thought. In reality, there was bone sticking out everywhere. Your arm was done for, and needed to be cut off. But you weren't having none of that foolish pig crap. You'd rather shave your hair. Check that. You liked your hair. You'd rather...oh forget it.

You looked back at Karkat who was now putting his shirt back on again, after ripping it off again. You rolled your eyes at him, and huffed. You stuck out your bottom lip, before putting it back. You wondered when your life was going to begin again and not be at the point where your arm was jacked up to crap and you had an alien beside you who kept undressing himself in pure rage. Of course you were stuck like this for another ten minutes, Karkat only wearing underwear. You wondered what went on in that crab crap head of his. After he got his shirt back on, he took a deep breath and threw a chair across the room, narrowly missing Rose who threw a bottle of some crap back at him, which he sliced in half with his sickle, which you even had to admit was pretty freaking awesome.

You finally sat up and looked around. You tried to stand up, but you had twisted your ankle so life of course had to be like 'Haha no way you ungrateful little shit.' like Bro would be. You sighed loudly, remembering the good times. And complete crap times you had. Karkat pulled you up by the collar, tears streaming down his face. Weird...

"You could've gotten yourself killed!" He screamed at you.

You then got that sudden urge to spew crap out of your nose. You did that trick where you press your tongue to the back of your top teeth but that crap just wasn't going to work. You sneezed all over Karkat's face. Time literally went in slow motion as he dropped you and just went into full Godzilla mode. He was jumping and the shirt was off. He was kicking and throwing things, cursing, and just completely nuts. You looked over at Rose who sighed and walked over to you.

"I may know a spell to help you...just please hold still."

You rolled your eyes and nodded and she went into magic mode. You closed your eyes, pain taking over your body. You winced, which looked kind of weird considering your eyes were FREAKING CLOSED. When you opened your eyes-oh hell naw. Oh HELL NAW TO THIS CRAP. You weren't on the asteroid any more. You were in a forest. A freaking forest where you knew wasn't Kansas. Your arm and ankle were okay now, but where you were wasn't. Rose had just jacked up life, time, and space and when you got back, you didn't care crap if she was a girl or not.

You stood up and stretched your now un-injured arm. It cracked a bit but who gives a hoot to that. You looked around, words that your mother (If you had one...which psshh you don't have one) would've washed your mouth with bleach for saying being said by you. Then a voice, a voice even more annoying than Terezi's, a voice that made you want to kill the person with the voice, rang out.

"GERRRMMMAAANNNYYY!"

You almost fell to your knees crying, but you had to keep your cool. You sighed and shook your head. Then all of a sudden, faster than bull crap coming from the bulls butt, a dude with one freaking curly hair that made you want to rip it out, was standing in front of you. You pulled your sword out of the handle and pointed it at him. Then he was waving a white flag, crying.

"Please don't hit me! Please don't hit me! I'll do anything! Please! I'll do anything! Well almost anything but please don't hit me!"

He was pretty much bawling and you winced. Okay maybe you would kill this pumpkin butt cheek later. But it would be pretty soon because any pity you felt from him was slowly fading away.

"Stand up." You said, rolling your eyes.

He wiped his eyes and stayed where he was. You rolled your eyes, and let out one of the deepest sighs of life and time.

"Who are you?" You asked him.

"I-Italy." He whimpered.

You sighed, leaning back slightly. This was just not happening. You were already pissed for peanuts.

"Italy is a fucking country you ass head! Who are you?" You yelled.

Before he could respond you sensed movement behind you. You whipped around, pointing a sword at the persons neck whose sword was also pointed to yours. Crap your life was at that point.

"Who are you?" The dude asked, with a really jacked up accent that you could barely understand. Was it Swedish or something...maybe Polish. Naw...he looked Chinese or something...Or Japanese. He had short black hair...No! He was German! You wanted to throw a punch at him, miss, and punch yourself so you could forget that you had ever thought that retarded thought. But you would look pretty stupid by doing that, and would have to repeat. And repeat until you just stabbed yourself with your sword.

"I will not ask again. Who are you?" He growled.

"Yo...dude. Let's calm down here, and look back at the shit that is going on. I wasn't going to kill the little guy. Okay I was but then I decided to be a better person and kill him later!"

He pushed the sword further into your neck. You felt blood slide down your neck.

"Dave. Who are you?"

"That is not important. Italy, what should we do with him?"

The boy who was still on his knees cried out 'The Allies!" Then crap started making sense. This was Hetalia. The show that Karkat and Rose loved. You were ready to punch yourself. Then punch these two crap butts, then jump off a cliff into butt city.

"Y-Yeah! Take me to them!" You said, your voice shaking slightly.

You were Dave Strider, and you were losing your cool.


	2. Chapter 2

**Be that troll with those nubby horns**

You were that troll with, amazing horns. Excuse you. And you, were freaking out to Heaven and below. Screaming at Rose, with your shirt off. You pulled it back on, still screaming. You had gone past normal tantrums. When your anger rose, the clothes came off.

"Karkat!" Rose screamed finally, enough taken with your complete crap.

You stopped, took a deep breath, and fell to your knees, tears spilling from your eyes. You had no idea why you were crying over the idiot called Dave Elizabeth Strider. Elizabeth. What. The. Fuck. Rose bent down, and pulled you in for a hug.

"We'll get him back. Now tell me more about your flushed feelings for him."

Hell. To. The. No. You pushed her away, and stood up, wiping your eyes. You ran off somewhere. You slowed down and decided, to cry again. You felt pathetic. Plain pathetic. Then you heard a honk. That set you off.

"Gamzee I don't have time for your shit!" You screamed, louder than you have ever screamed before. The honking stopped. You felt bad, but then the feeling went away. It was like Gamzee had no emotions sometimes. Didn't he understand that the guy you love has just been transported to Gog knows where? Guy you love? Hell. To. The. No. Again. Shit ain't happening.

You slid down the wall, sighing loudly. Dave was gone, arm and leg probably still jacked up for crap. The last thing you had said to him, well, I don't think I should put in the story, considering it might make me have to change the rating. To way, WAYY past mature. And that, I don't feel like doing. You closed your eyes and shook your head. You decided to go check your Pesterchum. See if Dave had sent anyone anything. See if John wanted to talk to you. See if there was some random crap head out there to talk to that had no idea who you were.

**Be that American**

You are now that American. Wait which one? Oh yeah. THAT American. Who was stuffing his face with hamburgers. Not paying attention to the phone, which was ringing very loudly.

"AMERICA! ANSWER THE BLOODY PHONE!" England shouted from another room.

You roll your eyes and put the phone up to your ear.

"Yello?"  
"This is Germany. I have called you for we have a prisoner who seems to be from your side."  
"Who?"

They have one of the Allies? Uh, no. No. No. nO.

"He calls himself...Dave."  
"Sorry, don't know a...Dave?"

Germany whispers something. There is another voice, which you don't recognize.

"Yeah hey there America. It's your old pal Dave. You better come save me before I save myself, which I can totally do, and kick your sorry-Shut up. But yeah. Save me. Be the crappy hero like in all those movies."

Be the hero? You were so in. So...yeah. You shot up and ran out the door, forgetting about the phone, and forgetting to ask where they were. You just...went.


	3. Chapter 3

**Be Dave**

You are Dave, and you are pissed. To. Peanuts. So, this Japanese dude...or...you know what, you don't care. This douche still has his sword at your neck. Italy is making a flower crown...or flower pasta thing...wow that dude loves pasta. Eh. He was growing on you. And then this guy...THIS...GUY. You had no words. He seemed...didn't I just freaking say you had no words? I did. So let's leave it at. That.

They had called America. Your least favourite character from Hetalia. Seriously that dude...reminded you way too much of John. And John...well, you would lose your cool if you had to continue. You missed the dork. But right now..you were well...yeah.

You sighed, and looked up. Then looked at Japan, who was glaring at you, then looked at Italy, who was making another flower pasta thing...yeah. And Germany was...You had no words. You were bored yet again. You could go for a round of peeved Karkat right now. Something to take your mind off of this horrible show, and horrible alternate universe you were stuck in. And also get off the fact a dude who is probably the most stupid character to have ever been created is coming to save your sorry butt. What. An. Amazing. Day.

"What do you guys do for fun?" You ask...sighing.

Italy jumps up and screams, while his body wavers in some weird, unhumanly possible, "PASTAAA." Then he sits back down and continues with his flower pasta makingness of things. You look at the other two.

"Well? Hey! Why don't you just let me go?" You shouted

Japan took his sword off your neck. He wiped your blood off of it, before putting it back to your neck.

"Seriously? You're going to do this until that other dude gets here?"

"We will not let you go, considering. And yes. I am." Japan said, really calmly.

You scoffed. Look at little Japan trying to be all cool and calm and collected. Look at him trying to be, "I'm going to kill you soon, but hey, why don't I be the nicest crap load of time and space." Okay you were about to go nuts because of this guy. And you were Dave Strider. You don't just go nuts

"Considering what?" You asked, leaning back against the tree, a little farther away from the blade.

"Considering."

"That is the best answer to a question I have ever heard in all my life. Thank you for that experience. I will try to treasure and cherish it for the rest of my existence."

"You are quite welcome."

You mumbled something under your breathe before sighing again. Where was that America dude anyways? You knew you should've paid more attention when Karkat ranted about him...and every other character. You stuck out your tongue then put it back in. Boredom. Boredom. Tick tock goes the clock, through the woods we go, watch out for the tall man...where's Johnny, oh no.

What. The...No. nO. NO. What was that? You made it up, so I don't know. But it was horrible. You should be ashamed. Which, you are.

**Be that Japanese dude**

You are now that Japanese dude. You stared at the captive. Sticking his tongue and humming to himself, very bored. He angered you. Being all calm and junk. And when he 'begged' America to come save him, he sounded more annoyed than scared. And that, well, angered you. How can someone be so...you had no words. He was sticking his tongue out and staring at it. You huffed, and set tdown your sword. He gave you a confused look, then went back to what he was doing.

You rolled your eyes yet again, and decided to walk around and stretch for a minute.

**Be that derpy kid with glasses.**

Wait, which one? Oh...wait. No...maybe...hm...Oh I know! But...hm...uh...John! No...Jade...No...Jake...No he's not even in this story...Jane? No...not in here either...Dave? Not raelly that derpy even though he is a loser...Rose? She doesn't wear glasses...

You roll your eyes and walk away. I sit here thinking about the possibilities of who it could be as the chapter ends horribly with me narrating.


	4. Chapter 4

**Be Karkat because I said so**

Way to put it nicely! Well, now you're Karkat and you are alone, and you cannot even begin to explain how fast tears are streaming down your face. Dave was gone, and you actually thought you were done crying over him. Rose said that she could get him back, but you two just had to watch the latest episode of Hetalia. You wipe your tears away, and sit beside Rose, who you swear rolls her eyes at you. She waves her hands in the air, and a small screen pops up. It's America racing through some woods, a burger being stuffed into his mouth. Then it switches to the Axis powers. Italy is making a flower crown, Germany is staring at something, sweating slightly, and Japan is..gone. Oh no there he is! He's walking back, and now he's sitting down. Oh it's Dave. Why is Dave-

**THE MOTHERFUCK THERE HE IS ROSE GET THE APPLE JUICE.  
**You have no idea how you even made that into a thought at all, then begin to ignore it.

"Well, the Axis have him...and Alfred seems to be very interested. We might need to send someone in after him."  
"Why don't we both go?"  
"What?"  
"We...we should both go."  
"That...fine. Close your eyes, hold your breath."

You close your eyes, not questioning why, and then pain is erupting through your body, and then your falling, and then there's someone screaming. You crack open an eye.

It's Britain.

And he's pretty pissed. That's really great.

**Be Rose**


	5. Chapter 5

How can you be Rose? Rose is in a void of nothingness being nothingness as she travels at the speed of _light _to a location in the world of Hetalia. She has not made it there yet, and will not be there for hours. If you're life is really as horrible as it seems to be, she will not be there for days. Maybe weeks. So, you cannot be Rose. You may never be Rose, or see Rose again. But what do I care? A lot actually Rose is one of my favorite characters how dare you accuse me of not caring or in a seeming way accuse me of not caring how dare you. Why don't you be Vriska? Maybe it'll make things ease up a bit considering the heat is getting a little hard to handle at the moment.

**Try again, smartass.**

You cannot be Vriska for she is not in this story right now and will never be in the story because she is dead and in a dream bubble and will not be coming out unless humanstuck! So stupid sometimes, I swear to Gog.

**Be Dave**

You are Dave, and _he-el-ll-lll no._

Hell no.

This.

You refuse.

You will not go with this craphead.

You will.

Not.

Just go. You wont have a sword at your neck anymore. Plus he might give you a burger. Maybe I should've put emphasis on might. Well, too late. But burgers Dave. Burgers. You'll love it. And even soda! Maybe.

I like doritos and apple juice.

Forget you. You're going with him. I control this story.

I thought you only narrated it.

I also control it so listen to me.

Aren't you the mayor?

I am Faygo.

How can Faygo be telling me what to do?

GO.

You go, after an argument that lasted way too long and made this chapter more annoying than needed. Thank you very much for that by the way. So America has found you, and kind of staring at you as he talks way too loud for your liking and chews too loud for your liking also. He's magically pulling burgers out of his pocket, and you...do not have words. You have been left speechless too many times today and it's getting on your nerves in ways it shouldn't. But not in ways of those nerves. No. I don't understand. Neither do I. Am I talking to myself? I think you are. Well, crap. Just crap. I thought I had gone past this. Well apparently you haven't. Crap.

But anyways you've reached this...oh my god house. And theres screaming. And it sounds like a bunch of jumbled words and large eyebrows. How did you even...no. But Alfred, you've learned his name, runs into the house, and you run after him. The scene you see is hilarious and frightening and you're not sure whether to cry, scream, laugh, or do all three. Karkat had no clothes on. Like, no clothes, the tentabulge unsheathed, and you...have seen it before. So why are you even worried? You aren't. And he also doesn't seem to notice. Huh. He's covered in tea, a buttery piece of bread sliding down his chest and darn son. And theres crumbs in his hair. Then there's who you're guessing is Britain or England or whatever considering his eyebrows go way out of the caterpillar category. His shirt is off too, so now you are a bit worried. He is also covered in tea and has bread all over him. And they have both gone gone. If you took away the nakedness of it all, you would have one hilarious scene. But why is Karkat naked? Oh wait he's pulling his boxers back on and his shirt. His pants are on the ceiling fan and there's no getting them down. Ever. Who cares though? Not you and not me. Maybe we just both like Karkat with pants off. And even more so without clothes at all. Neither of us will do a creepy laugh because that's not cool and it's creepy. But back to the story

Karkat and England are back to being normal, and you are by Karkat, him hugging the crap out of you and you patting him awkwardly, scratch that, _cooly, _on the back, trying to calm him down as he cries. America is by England, shoosh papping him, and it's sort of weird considering he's actually, _shoosh papping_ him. He's saying shoosh and pap as he paps him. Okay slightly weird. You decide to speak up.

"PAY ATTENTION TO ME!" You shout very loudly trying to get them to pay attention to you because you want them to pay attention to you for you have something very important to say and you need their attention so they pay attention when you say it and oh my gog shut up.

They all pay attention to you because- no.

"Sup. The names Dave. This is Karkat. I know you're Alfred. And you're applebottom or some crap."

England glares at you, His hands are balled up and his eye is twitching. Tea is all over apron and shirt and his pants. America has an arm wrapped around him, his eye fine. Okay maybe twitching ever so slightly. Nah.

"Arthur."  
"Whatever you say applebottom."

You think he might murder you at this point. Heh.

"I know who you two are. You're Karkat and Dave."  
"Yes, dear we went over that."  
"No. From Homestuck."

The heck is Homestuck?

"And you're from Hetalia!" You shout at him, acting like you know exactly what Homestuck is, which you don't.

"The heck is Hetalia?" America asked.

Oh.

The feeling is mutual then. Very...mutual.

* * *

**I'm really sorry for these past two sucky chapters. It's been some time since I watch Hetalia, since I lost a bit of my obsession with it, other things clogging up my think I also was early in Homestuck, maybe about act 4 or the beginning of five when I started this. Since then I have read every page.  
But yeah. I was planning on never updating this again. But you guys kept asking and I felt really bad...so yeah.  
And don't worry! I really enjoy writing this! Especially Dave's part.  
Also thank you guys so much! And that person that I forgot the username of who said I keep Dave in character very well...I really don't. But thank you anyways!  
But yehhs. I hope you enjoyed this horrible chapter.**


	6. Authors Note

Hello wonderful readers! So, today, I am telling you some sad, sad news. Well for me, I'm a little relieved. For you...I have no clue. All my stories are going to be put on hold. I'm working on a lot of stories a the moment, and I deleted two, that I know I should work on more. They weren't good, and I didn't do a read over. So yeah. All my stories are going to be put on hold, until everything is sorted out. I'm also going to be editing chapters in all my stories, adding things, deleting things. All the jizz jazz.

I really just want to make all my stories up to quality, so that's going to take some time. It might be a few weeks, it might be a few months. And no, I'm not being lazy. I'm up to my neck in work, and I really just want to get started. The sooner I get started, the sooner I get done, and the sooner you get an update.

So all my stories are now on hold. If you want any quick updates on how much I've gotten done with everything, just message me up.

And thank you so much.

~Faygo


	7. Chapter 7

**Be America**

Well, okay.

So, after all the crap had been sorted out, and after a few punches to faces, and a bit of bleeding and crying, all four of you were now sitting outside the mansion. You had been really confused. They, didn't know they were from Homestuck. You really didn't know what you expected really. You hadn't even read the comic. Arthur had though, and he seemed to not really like it. You remember maybe him bringing it up once, kind of yelling about how Vriska had died and what not. Actually, now that you think about it, he had stopped reading it completely after he had sprung that up. Wow. It must've really taken a toll on him then. Um...wow again.

So, back to the present, Dave, who you have taken a liking too, wink wonk, is explaining that he has no idea what Homestuck is, how he got here, and how Karkat got here. You don't really like Karkat all that much. He seems nice enough, but he's really cranky. Dude needs to loosen up a bit, sip some Pepsi. Tea was okay, but you didn't like the British way of it. You liked sweet tea. Unsweet tea with sugar. Pure Heaven. You...don't really understand how half of your country doesn't really have that great an understanding of sweet tea. Who even puts raspberry in tea? It's horrible, and should be thrown away and nobody should like it, and if they do, then their tea tasting sense are off by thousands. Like, did it never occur to anyone, that sugar may have been what was making the tea so sweet? People put sugar in coffee to make it sweeter. Why not tea? Isn't that what Arthur did? Yeah, it is. How was half of your country missing out on one of the best inventions ever? Really. Like, how?

**Okay seriously douche, back to the present.**

Rude. But...wait...It just now occurred to you, there's been this little voice in your head telling you what to do. It's...weird. You cant tell exactly what it sounds like. One minute some random British dude and a girl. And sometimes, it's just there. It...doesn't sound like anything. You...decided not to think about it any more. You can really live without having to deal with this. But it did call you a douche...and it said back to the present, whatever that means. You are in the present. Right now. But now that's the past...Is there really a present? I mean, now that's the past and that's the past and that's-oh wow. There is no present. Your whole life has been a lie. You...are not surprised. A lot of your life has been strange. This, really is nothing new, you guess. Wow. Who is Vriska any way? She...you'll look her up later. Maybe you might read Homestuck. But you're way too busy for that. You're a busy dude. You have things to do. Places to be. People to see. Actually not really. It's just stupid meetings with friends as you all argue and start wars and kidnap Italy. It's really stupid.

It just occurred to you, that your whole life, is pointless. What are you even doing? What have you accomplished? A lot of things. But...wow. Your life...is pretty boring. I mean, it's cool being immortal and all, and getting unlimited hamburgers, but...wow. You really need to get more of a social life. Why are you realizing all these things all of a sudden? They could have just as easily came to you sooner. Or later. Life is weird. What is the meaning of life any ways? You tried asking Japan once, but he kind of just slowly backed away shaking his head. Then he ran away screaming. So unlike him. What had he done wrong? All he had done was ask a deep question. Japan was a pretty deep guy you guess. He had a lot of answers...Most of the time. Man. Why are you even thinking of this? What about these two guys sitting in front of you? Where are you even looking? Oh. You've been looking at a tree. It's an okay tree you guess. Could be taller. Could have more leaves. Wait what?

**Dude, listen to the douches**

The voice tells you to do something. You decide not to listen to it, and ignore everything that it will ever say to you. In fact, you will do the opposite of whatever it says.

**Don't kiss Arthur**

Well, okay. You don't kiss Arthur. You don't know why the thought even occurred to you. Arthur isn't anything more than a friend.

**Oh my god, just be Rose**

Uh..well...you're Rose now. I guess. She still isn't there. She...doesn't even exist at the moment. Still traveling through the universes...so uh...yeah.

**So...be that tree**

You're that tree Alfred was staring at. You're a tree. And...you're well, a tree. You...cant really do anything. You're a tree...Well, this is awkward. Um...Okay.

**Captchalogue grass**

You're a tree...and you have no idea what that means. You cant even pick up grass. You're a tree for God's sakes.

**Well...then uh...be Karkat**

You have no idea what that means. You're a tree, if it hasn't occurred to you. You just ind of sway in the wind. You really have no purpose. You're a tree.

**Please be Karkat**

Again, you are a tree. You do not know what that means. You are not a Karkat, you do not know what a Karkat is, and you never want to be a Karkat. Karkat's are stupid, and shouldn't exist. All Karkat's should die. Like get shot or be _stabbed. _If they can even die. But Karkat's are stupid. They should fall down some stairs if that's even possible. But you have no idea what stairs are. Or what getting shot or getting stabbed means. You just go with the flow, and think. But you're a tree, and you cant do that. But you do any ways, because who cares. Not you. You cant. You're a tree.

**Okay that's enough tree be Karkat**

You give up on being a tree, even though it was nice, and be Karkat. You have a bloody nose, from when Arthur punched you. Seriously. How could he? Your favorite character. Hmph! Inexcusable! Then he went quiet and apologized and handed you a cup of tea. Still. Inexcusable! So you're Karkat, and this tea sucks. You tried a scone, and you couldn't eat it. At all. It was too hard.

But we're back to the present, and Dave had just finished explaining. You nod, and he intertwines his fingers with yours. Uh...okay. Kismesis to moirails to...what was this becoming? It was weird. You had done things with him, like twice, and then it stopped. You hated, then became friends...then you sort of found yourself falling for him. You hated it. You didn't want to feel this way, knowing he could never feel the same back. He pulled his hand away from yours, and glanced over at you but you missed it.

It was kind of painfully obvious that America liked Dave. And Dave...sort of liked America? But he hated America when watching it. Okay life was confusing, and you really needed to calm yourself.

But you were Karkat...and that's kind of hard to do.

* * *

**Wow so hey guys! I updated a lot faster than I thought I would on this one...so here it is. I really like this chapter, and well, I hope you did too! Than you guys!**


	8. Authors Note That Really Doesn't Matter

Wow okay so this isn't an update, but I just wanted to let you guys know this is now on Archive of Our Own. So yeah.


	9. Chapter 9

Woow this chapter is super short. And I've been making you guys wait for a really long time! And...this chapter sucks. He. You all have permission to kill me. Ha. So any ways, hope you enjoy, and...yeah. Also, I've gotten an idea for a story, somewhat like this one. Only not really a cross over. But it can be, I guess?

A truth or dare thing. I dunno. I really shouldn't have be posting any thing else when I've got this and another fan fic on the golden platter that is this website.

I guess tell me if you want me to write something like that or not...I guess.

And dares and truths would be submitted by the readers...I guess. I dunno. Just...yeah. Okay.

So, moving on.

I've also posted this story on Archive! I cant remember if I've already said this...but yeah!

So, yeah...again!

* * *

Be Terezi

Well okay. You're Terezi...and you're a bit confused. You've been looking everywhere for honarary cool kid but he's nowhere to be sniffed! You even tried to find Nub Nubs, but to no avail, he wasn't anywhere either. You are starting to suspect they are in the black quadrant again, but maybe they have gone a bit more red...hm...

You decide to put your sniffers for the long haul again, and try to find Kanaya. And you do! You can tell she's reading, but you better stop that nonsense and ask her where Karkat and Dave are.

"I have not seen them. Rose has also gone missing. Have you...um...sniffed her?"  
"No, unfortunately not."  
"Well, where might they have gone?"  
"I have no clue. But I know they were in here earlier. Should we start to panic?"  
"...That would not help the situation. At all."  
"Yeah..."

Well, that has gotten you nowhere in ten minutes. Sigh. But okay. Maybe Karkat and Dave are almost done with their whatever their doing with Rose. Maybe it's like, quadrants. Or something. Gog you're bad with this kind of stuff! You're a troll, and you hardly wrap around the quadrants, not being very good with them! You're almost worse than Eridan! Okay no, do not even.

Terezi, be Japan.


	10. Chapter 10

**Wow I feel like it's been forever since I updated. I'm sure it has been. Ha...ha ha. So I decided to write this at two in the morning. Not sure why, but I felt like it was a good idea. I felt like I could do an Average Joe kind of deed. Like I said, it's two in the morning. If anything here makes no sense then...you know why. Any way...I don't know how regularly this will be updated. Don't expect anything great, because then you will definitely be let down. **

**But...otherwise, more chapters are coming. And they, hopefully, will be longer and...a lot better than whatever this load of crap is.  
**

**So yeah.**

**~Faygo**

* * *

Hey so you wanted to be Japan right?

Not happening.

Ha. Fooled you.

Why would you be Japan? You could never compare to him.

Kolkolkol-

Russia. The fuck you doing?

Thought so.

Okay so guess what?

Guess.

Yeah...you're still not gonna be Japan. High five Russia!

He already left so that...was awkward.

But good news!

You're Romano!

What is that? You don't want to be Romano? Why wouldn't you want to be Romano? You-Wha-I.

Then who the fuck do you want to be?

Italy? The other Italy? ITALY NUMBER TWO?

REALLY?

Okay. Fine. But only because Italy is so kawaii will you be allowed this one thing. And be grateful! I could've made you be that tree again! Or Karkat! Yeah! We woulda went there!

So, you are Italy.

And you are currently walking to Englands house. Why?

Germany and Japan decided that it was not okay to let a prisoner go.

So they decided to send you to go and collect the Dave person. Dave was nice. You liked Dave. Dave had blond hair and...wore glasses! He didn't even try to kill you!

You're Italy, so you're staying oblivious. Don't even pull that with me. This may have been a very long hiatus but I don't want to.

No.

Stop.

So you finally arrived. You heard shouting, and...what the heckaloo?

You opened the front door, or you more or so stepped over it, considering it had been kicked down. And the doorknob was gone.

Ignorance is bliss, is it not?

I don't know. I'm edumicated.

So, you walked through the house, dropping little pieces of pasta as you went. Pasta is great, and everyone should be blessed with it. Even in the most ridiculous ways.

No questioning.

That's the rule.

And I don't want to pull a Dangan Ronpa. We will save refrences for later! A'ight? A'ight.

So, Italy, go to the kitchen.


End file.
